Stuff about the final episode after the cut! (Brief synopsis: it didn't come close to topping last year's finale, but it was still a pretty good show.)
We start with Blake and Jordin performing "I Saw Her/Him Standing There" as a duet. Fun!
Gwen Stefani's on the video screen, performing "Four In The Morning." I've gotta say, I'm not really a fan of performances not on the Idol stage itself. Sorta takes away from the spectacle of the Big! Live! Show!
Kelly Clarkson! Whoo-hoo! Rockin' out with her new single, "Never Again."
...and it's the return of the Golden Idol Awards. I shouldn't be smiling this broadly, and yet I am.
Best Presentation goes to Margaret Fowler, who picks it up resplendent in yellow Muppet-skin. I swear the orchestral accompaniment incorporates a couple bars from the old Sesame Street arrangement. And her cell phone rings when he gets on stage. And she reads an alleged poem to Simon. There are no words.
The top 6 guys warble a doo-wop number. And then Smokey Robinson schools them. And then they all perform "Tears of a Clown."
Blake raps with Doug E. Fresh. ...and it's a beatbox-off! (Blake wins, but incorporates numerous shoutouts to Doug E., so I guess it's okay.)
Golden Idol: Most Original Vocal goes to Sholandric Shalworth (?), who performs "Silent Night" at Randy's request, and is audible despite being several feet from the microphone.
The top 6 girls sing "I Heard It Through the Grapevine," acquitting themselves much better than the boys did. And here's Gladys Knight! Whoo!
...this may be the dullest blog posting ever. But I'm not about to stop now.
Tony Bennett performs "For Once In My Life." Honestly, love it or hate it -- and right now, it's a mixture of both -- nobody gets a mix of performers like Idol.
Why is Randy wearing a mariachi outfit?
Golden Idols: Best Buddies. The bush baby and his special friend, the Paris Hilton clones, or... Simon and Ryan. Ha! But it's the first pair, Kenneth and Jonathan, that wins. And Idol has sponsored an actual bush baby in Kenneth's honor at the Milwaukee County Zoo... named "Simon."
Melinda performs with the people she used to sing backup for. Didn't catch the name.
Ford commercial: "Time After Time." Coincidentally, I discovered "Lactose Intolerant" a few days ago and it's taken up residence in my head since. Oh, and Blake and Jordin get Ford Mustangs.
Carrie Underwood is in the house! Performing "I'll Stand By You."
And Clive Davis is here to present the album sales scorecard. Daughtry is the music industry's biggest artist of the year, selling more than 2.5 million albums. Shoutout to Jennifer Hudson. And to the songwriters. And Fantasia. And now he's presenting Carrie Underwood with a cheesy-looking sign recognizing 6 million domestic album sales. Were I making any effort to be entertaining, I'd probably speculate about how much it'd fetch on eBay.
And now, the African Children's Choir.
Oh, dear. Dramatic montage of visionaries through history and Also Sprach Zarathustra, leading to Sanjaya, performing with Joe Perry of Aerosmith. ...singing "You Really Got Me." They hate us.
Where's Crying Girl? I expect to see Crying Girl! ...ah, here she is. Crying, of course.
And here's Green Day, with "Working Class Hero."
With no ado at all, Taylor Hicks comes out singing after the commercial break. I'm pretty sure I just felt a seismic wave generated by Pam's cringing, one state over.
There is nothing like a good harmonica solo. And that was, in fact, nothing like a good harmonica solo.
Jordin and Ruuuuuuuuben!
And now, Bette Midler with "Wind Beneath My Wings." My feelings about the eclectic mix of performances swings sharply toward "hate it."
Idol's tribute to "Seargent Pepper!" Kelly Clarkson and Joe Perry perform the title song; Taylor Hicks read the news today, oh boy; Carrie Underwood tells us "She's Leaving Home" as this year's female finalists sing backup; Ruben describes "Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds" as the male finalists join in; assorted finalists get by with a little help from their friends. And that's that. No "Being for the Benefit of Mr. Kite!" in this medley.
...man, they're not leaving any time for the results announcement. Which means Jordin must have won, because they'd have to allow for some buildup if there were an upset. Right?
74 million votes last night. Ryan is handed the envelope with the results.
Randy predicts Jordin won; Paula is proud of both of them; Simon congratulates Jordin.
And the winner is... [long pause] Jordin!
Final pool standings: I run the table on Jordin, taking first place with 31 points. (I told you so!) Frito has an excellent debut year, taking second place (and, with any luck, the mix CD) with 28 points. Mo Pie is just barely behind him with 27.5. TeKay has 24, Pam has 18.5, Jesse has 18, and I stopped rolling over Mel's picks, so she ends up with 17.
Thanks to everybody who participated and commented! It always makes this much more fun. Let's do it again next year!
Three songs apiece: contestant's favorite from past performances, a new one of their choice, and the winning song from the Idol songwriting competition. (Which can't possibly be worse than the original songs they've commissioned in the past. Right?)
Read on for reactions typed as the show goes along...
Blake won the coin toss, but let Jordin decide the order. He goes first.
Blake: You Give Love a Bad Name (rerun)
Totally brilliant.
Quoth Simon: Blake isn't the best singer left, but he is the best performer. Simon is right.
Jordin: Fire (new pick) [Oops. Fighter. Thanks, TeKay!]
Not bad. And supports both aspects of what Simon said before.
Simon calls round one for Blake. And I concur.
To nobody's surprise, when asked by Ryan, Paula says it's a tie.
Randy says Jordin had the better vocals, Blake had the better performance.
Blake: She Will Be Loved (new pick)
Blake is clearly agog at the size of the crowd. It's kinda endearing.
Anyway, he plays this one straight, which is a good idea, all things considered. Nice job. A bit thin, but maybe that'll help the contrast from the first number.
Jordin A Broken Wing (rerun)
Good performance! I'd give this round to Jordin, and I'll bet Simon concurs.
Simon has four words: "Now, that was good."
Blake: This Is My Now (songwriting contest winner)
Blake's got the Kermit-singing-Rainbow-Connection pose going on.
Yeah, this song is up to the usual Idol-original standard. Because the world needed another "A Moment Like This," crossed with "This Is The Night" for good measure.
All three judges concur that this was an awesomely bad singer/song mismatch.
Jordin: This Is My Now (songwriting contest winner)
Can I say once again that the entire concept of shoehorning contestants into performing an arbitrary song is very very bad idea? Because Jordin is actually coming close to making this sound good. It's about as fair to Blake as assigning a freestyle beatbox number would be to Jordin.
Randy calls the whole enchilada for Jordin.
Paula gushes.
Simon says he was wrong in thinking that Jordin wasn't good enough for the finale. It is a singing competition, he notes, and she just wiped the floor with Blake.
Simon says the best individual performance was Blake's first, but that the best overall singer was Jordin.
...oh, please tell me they're not dragging out Paul Anka.
No, it's Daughtry. Whew!
All things considered, Blake probably should've sung his songs in reverse order from what he did; as it stands, he started strong and petered out, while Jordin got better as she went along. She's totally gonna win this.
Can a beatboxer go all the way? How about a 17-year-old? Make your final prediction here!
If you don't want to know the breakdown of who stands to gain what if either of the two possible outcomes takes place next week, read no further.
The following does not include the final two points that will come from next week's predictions. As you'll see, that last decision can make a difference in either outcome, especially considering that the perhaps-mythical mix CD goes to the first runner-up in the event that I win.
Also note that while I double-check the numbers every week, human error is a possibility; if I've screwed anything up, please let me know.
Taking only the points on the table from the first ten weeks, here's the rundown:
Standings, If Blake Wins:
Mo Pie: 20.5
Frito: 20
Pam: 17.5
Mel: 17
TeKay: 16
Shmuel: 12
Jesse: 7
Standings, If Jordin Wins:
Shmuel: 29
Frito: 26
Mo Pie: 25.5
TeKay: 22
Pam: 18.5
Mel: 17
Jesse: 16
Best of luck!
Almost 60 million votes! Spoilers follow!
Jordin is safe! Suddenly my pool hopes are alive again!
So, which upset is it?
Melinda is going home.
Blake makes it to the finale!
Honestly, any of the three outcomes would have been reasonable. I think this is the strongest Top Three ever.
Mo Pie and I pick up 5 points apiece; Frito gains 3; TeKay gets 2.
For whatever it's worth, here were my reactions while watching...
JORDIN: Simon's Pick: Wishing on a Star
S'okay.
BLAKE: Paula's Pick: Roxanne
Excellent song choice. And nice job.
MELINDA: Randy's Pick: I Believe in You and Me
From a vocal standpoint, she continues to blow everybody else away. You absolutely can't count her out of the running.
...it occurs to me that Season Two's Top 3 may no longer be the best yet. Maybe.
JORDIN: Producers' Pick: She Works Hard for the Money
Good choice, competent execution. I hope she's able to put her heart into the song she's picked herself, or she's probably toast.
BLAKE: Producers' Pick: This Love
Excellent!
MELINDA: Producers' Pick: Nutbush City Limits
She just hit that out of the ballpark. I see my pool selections flashing before my eyes...
JORDIN: I Who Have Nothing
Jordin is back in the game!
BLAKE: When I Get You Alone
If Blake is not in the top two, something is very wrong with the world. That rocked.
MELINDA: I'm a Woman
...I have a sinking feeling that I'm losing my pool bragging rights this year.
Randy thinks it's gonna be Jordin and Melinda in the finals. Paula is noncommittal. Simon commits only to wanting Melinda to make it.
If we were ignoring all prior predictions, and I had to make the call right now, I'd probably predict Blake, Melinda, Jordan as the final lineup, from Idol to third place. But given everything I have riding on Jordan, Blake, Melinda, I'm gonna stay the course.
Spoilers follow!
Jordin is safe!
Melinda is safe!
Simon guesses that LaKisha is gonna be leaving.
Simon is right. Blake is safe! LaKisha comes in fourth.
Frito gets 6 points; Mel gets 5; Pam and TeKay get 4; Mo Pie gets 3; Jesse and I get 2.
Current overall standings:
Frito 15
Pam 13.5
Mo Pie 12.5
Mel 12
TeKay 11
Jesse 7
Shmuel 7
There are a whole lot of points riding on the endgame, though.
Here goes...
...sadly, I was napping, so I missed the start. I know Phil was the first to go, but I don't yet know if any significance was assigned to that. Chris went at the end, after he and Blake proclaimed their eternal friendship and joint tour plans. More to follow.
Also, the planned scoring system method for this week appears after the jump.
Okay, so here's the deal. In the event that they specify in the results who came in last, and who came in second-to-last, then the last-place person will be deemed to have come in 6th place, and the next-to-last person will be deemed to have come in 5th place.
In the event that they kick the bottom two off without specifying which got more votes, then .5 points will be awarded for every 5th place and every 6th place prediction made for both contestants.
I will be the first to grant that this screws things up somewhat, but it seems the best I can do under the circumstances.