7:46 PM: Stressed

So I went to see a counselor at school yesterday, having hit the point where I couldn't deal with everything on my own a few days ago. The next available appointment was in three weeks, but somebody there happened to be free and was willing to see me to assess my situation. So I listed a bunch of the current stressors, getting most of the way through the list: the financial stuff, the academic stuff, the social stuff, the religious stuff, and so on. She asked me whether I'd ever had to deal with this much stress in the past.

"Actually," I said, "this isn't so bad."

Her eyes widened.

So that much was validating.

Actually, the validation was useful in itself. The good news is that I've been around the block enough times to know when I need help before getting to the point of a complete meltdown; the downside is that part of me thinks that if I know enough to be able to make that diagnosis, I also ought to be able to handle everything on my own. I'm not going to claim that this makes perfect sense.

Anyway, so it seems that I definitely need an "intervention," and that while she thinks that it probably ought to include medication, I'm doing just well enough that she's not going to push for that, given that I'm really not comfortable with the idea. Although she made me promise that I'd either get emergency counselling or swing by the hospital if things got any worse before my next appointment with her, which she's somehow managing to fit in on Thursday. In the meantime, I am to breathe deeply, make sure I get enough food and sleep, and maybe read a good book.

On the bright side, I'm feeling rather better today. My brother's helping with the financial crisis du jour (which is a tire patch on the larger problem, but at least forestalls the collapse for a bit), and I'm about to get in touch with the program director regarding the clueless professor. I don't expect the latter to help, but one can hope. Now I just need to come up with a decent topic for a sports column, and get back into the job hunt. Well, among other things.

Breathe deeply. Right.

12:42 AM: Just in case you ever wondered...

Teresita of Cabora is your folk saint, a survivor of childhood abuse and a brutal rape leading to a coma, from which she awoke with mystical powers, said to include healing, seeing the future, a talent for hypnosis, and the ability to change her body size at will. Chased out of Mexico by dictator Porfirio Diaz, who was afraid of her influence, she ended up in Clifton, AZ, where she did miracles and then died of tuberculosis.

Which Mexican Folk Saint Is For You?
brought to you by Quizilla

2:20 PM:

11:26 PM: Unconscious Mutterings

1. Herpes::Simplex
   
2. Freddy::Krueger
   
3. October::Sunday
   
4. Hunting::Will
   
5. MSN::BC
   
6. 36::63
   
7. Hotel::California
   
8. Travesty::Art
   
9. Health::Check
   
10. Conditions::Futile
    

I'm stuck in class for hours each week;
I'm learning nothing in it.
The prof. knows not of what she speaks—
I'm stuck in class for hours each week.
I'm tense, upset. I want to shriek
With every passing minute.
I'm stuck in class for hours each week.
I'm learning nothing in it.

(This requires that you pronounce "prof." as written; that is, as a one-syllable abbreviation. Not very elegant, but I did write this during class. Thank goodness for Palm Pilots.)